When a loved one dies, it can leave us with such a strong longing to see them again, if only for a second, or just one-more-time. This longing for a visitation from them can be consuming. What if…we could connect with them again and spend some valuable time together? How often have you had a dream that made you sit up in bed and say, “Wow! That dream was awesome. It was just what I needed.”
Well, I had the best dream last night.
I had set my intention to see one of my best friends who died this time last year from a rare form of Leukemia. My intention was to have a dream visitation. We were tennis partners, our husbands played tennis together, and we vacationed in exotic places like the British West Indies Island of Anguilla between my cancer treatments. (Yes, I am a three-time breast cancer survivor whose dream diagnosed her illness missed by the medical community and the tests on which they relied.) She was there for me during all three of my breast cancer treatments and all that they encompassed.
When she died a piece of my heart died. The disbelief and grief that set in once I realized she was truly gone was physically tangible. It covered and suffocated me like a heavy wet blanket.
Months passed, and I realized I needed to see her again if only for a little while, to know where she was, and to see how she was doing.
So I set my dream intention before bed to see her in my dreams. Yeah, I was that desperate.
During a dream, she walked in and said, “Wanna get a drink?” We sat in a beautiful restaurant with a lovely classy bar, and I ordered a martini while we chatted… just like old times. But, when her martini came, it had sliced carrots and celery in the glass but no liquid. I asked her about this. “Oh I don’t drink anymore,” she said, “but I wanted to see you, too.” Dream or reality?
Setting our dream intention is easier than it sounds. You can even write your intention down on a piece of paper and place it under your pillow to “sleep on it.” This is taking the 5th dimension abstract concept of intention and turning it into a concrete reality in the form of words on paper.
Tonight set your dream intention and sweet dreams. How will you know if it was just a dream or reality in a dream? Validation. What was discussed in the dream that rings true to you? What happened or was said that was a piece to a puzzle?
The video podcast below takes you through the steps of creating your dream intention. Enjoy the show.
About Kathleen (Kat) O’Keefe-Kanavos: VIDEO Podcaster, Radio Show Host, three-time Breast Cancer Survivor, and Dream Expert seen on Dr. Oz, DOCTORS, NBC, & CBS. Her Divine Dreams diagnose her illness. Kat and Duke U Dr. Larry Burk co-wrote Dreams That Can Save Your Life. She’s a Syndicated Columnist, TV Producer/Host and award-winning Author/Lecturer who promotes patient advocacy and connecting with Divine-guidance through Dreams. “Don’t tell God how big your problems are. Tell your problems how big your God is.” Learn more @ www.KathleenOKeefeKanavos.com
How often do we take something
like a trip to the beach for granted? After reading this article, you may think twice about
walking-on-by the next time you see someone sitting a bit anxiously on a beach
towel. Perhaps a smile is all it will take to put that person at ease and make
their beach experience a great one, again. You may never know how bumpy their
road in life is but a friendly smile can make their trip easier, even if only
for the day. Healing starts one second, one minute, and one day at a time. And… after reading this story, you may never look
at chicken cutlets the same way again.
It is my pleasure to share an amazing writer with you.
My guest writer today is
Connie Bramer who, like me, is a breast cancer survivor/thriver and an author
who wrote the snarkiest book, How Connie
Got Her Rack Back, (most of the time I tried not to fall out of my chair
laughing) about her experiences concerning everyday-life during cancer treatment
and her ultimate survival to become a Thought Leader. Today Connie helps other
cancer patients and their families during and after treatment.
I believe anyone who laughs at themselves laughs with the world. ~Kat Kanavos
Laughter is a big part
of the healing process. So laugh ‘till it heals while reading this article.
Walking hand-in-hand with her while I read how Connie got her rack back was an
honor. I now share this honor with you, my readers, with the hope that Connie’s
sense of humor lifts your spirts and brings a chuckle to your heart.
Kathleen (Kat) O’Keefe-
Kanavos
A Trip to the Beach
by Connie Bramer
We all have our
insecurities, and perhaps I’m mentioning
the beach bit now – in the middle of winter no less – because I just got back
from a beach vacation. No one wants to run full-on Bo Derek down the sandy edge
of the ocean after eating Thanksgiving dinner, Christmas cookies, and all the penne a la vodka in between. In
this case, we are talking about me. Or are you in this scenario also?
Anyway, here is the drill.
You spend copious
amounts of time and postage buying bathing suits, throwing them on and saying
under-your-breath “WTF was I thinking,” only to toss them back in the bag,
throw on your boots and take a trip to the post office to return. Sound
familiar?
You finally find the most “suitable” no-pun-intended suit for your body,
because there is no designer on earth that nails it perfectly for every varying
body that God and our eating and exercise habits has bestowed upon us. By the
way, men, do you struggle with this at all? Or do you not care? Which is it?
So you squeeze into your suit, throw on
a cover-up and head to the beach.
You sit down on your towel;
strip off the cover-up and think, “Is anyone looking at me?” I noticed this the
other day as I did much the same on my hombre blue towel only to notice that no
one gave two shi** about the girl from NY stripping away her cover-up on the
beach.
But here is one aspect we breast cancer (and many other types of cancer)
survivors don’t voice. Some of us have deformities where once a strong part of
our bodies used to reside. Me, I know my breasts are not perfect now after umpteen
surgeries to rid myself of my cancer and to reconstruct my new “rack,” but
whose breasts are once you pass your mid-forties and have birthed two children?
I think of the women I know and those I don’t
know who chose not to have reconstruction or those who chose to have one
mastectomy and have what we call a “chicken-cutlet” prosthesis on one side. My
mom had that, and I know that it used to
get too hot on her chest so sometimes she would take it out and put it in the
kitchen table! And no, not for chicken dinner as my younger brother once
decided to inquire.
So why am I writing all of this? What is
the point? Here is the epiphany if you will.
We all
come in different shapes and sizes, backgrounds and experiences. We are all imperfect, so why do we
continue to beat ourselves up about it? And moreover, WHO CARES?
We are our own worst enemies.
Take what you will from
this short story of self-reflection. My only ask is that you lighten up on yourself a little because that’s what
I’m going to do. They say that misery loves
company but so does happiness. So, be a little kinder to yourself.
Thank
you, Connie Bramer, for sharing your deep insights on self-reflection with us. Yes,
it is our choice with what and whom we surround ourselves. And since we are
always wherever we go, perhaps we should lighten-up on ourselves to promote our
own happiness. Connie, it is my hope that you will share more of your wisdom
with us in the near future.
Guest Writer Bio: Constance (Connie) Bramer is a Breast
Cancer Survivor and author of How Connie Got Her Rack Back. She
is the Founder/CEO of Get Your Rack Back
Inc. which supports cancer patients and their families. Learn more about Connie
here: https://gyrb.org/
About Kathleen (Kat) O’Keefe-Kanavos: VIDEO Podcaster,
three-time Breast Cancer Survivor, and Dream Expert seen on Dr. Oz,
DOCTORS, NBC, & CBS. Her Divine Dreams diagnose her illness. Kat and Duke U Dr. Larry Burk co-wrote, Dreams That Can Save Your Life. She’s a Syndicated Columnist, TV
Producer/Host and award-winning Author/Lecturer who promotes patient advocacy
and connecting with Divine-guidance through Dreams. “Don’t tell God how big
your problems are. Tell your problems how big your God is.” Learn more @ www.KathleenOKeefeKanavos.com
Photo Credit: httpspixabay.comenshells-sand-beach-vacation-792912Pixabya
Free for Commercial Use no Attribution Required
“Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” ~ George Santayana, philosopher
Who among us is not governed, to some degree, by the dark secrets of our past? Emotionally based dreams can manifest as daytime life-storms that refuse to remain contained. They have a way of building and blowing our existence to pieces like a clean dress the color of sky ripped from a clothesline and tossed into the mud.
fish-1358427_1280 floede, pixabay.com Public Domain, Free Commercial Use, No Attribution Required
Just when we think bad memories are forgotten, healed by time, and that all is well in our lives, something triggers a thought that manifests in a dream, which leads to an emotional door in our past hidden deep within the bowels of our psyche. The door, although tightly shut and locked, blows open by the sheer force of pent-up past emotions. A real-life nightmare once contained in silent darkness is unleashed into the light of day. Left unchecked it will consume all that is good beneath the clear blue sky.
Here is food for thought: Unchecked memories can grow strong on unhealed emotions.
Memories can begin to run wild through the paths of our lives like a pack of rats bringing life-threatening disease (dis-ease) with them. Research published in Science Daily shows that happy or sad, our emotions and physical health are inextricably linked. Dr. Rollin McCraty of the Institute of HeartMath in the US is studying the link between, emotions, physical health and how they trigger the peptide hormone oxytocin.
Depression, pessimism, and apathy affect our health in several ways.
“Low mood is linked to low levels of serotonin and dopamine, the feel-good neurotransmitters in the brain,’ says London GP Dr. Jane Flemming. “Serotonin plays a role in regulating pain perception and could be the reason why 45 percent of patients with depression also suffer aches and pains.” So, what is a person to do?
How can we cope with a past hell-bent on destroying our future?
Jennifer Irwin is on tour with her book, “A Dress the Color of Sky” which chronicles the up-hill battle of bad past memories. But, you can meet her here, and now, with this VIDEO Interview on the Kat Kanavos Show.
A Dress the Color of Sky
The story-line of A Dress, the Color of Sky, takes you through the difficult life of a woman named Prudence who is entering rehabilitation for sex addiction, and self-loathing, in order to deal with her disturbing past secrets and to save her faltering marriage.
Prudence has lost faith in herself and life. She feels she is blowing in the wind and cannot predict what her future holds.
How important is it to us to feel in control of our future? Research published in an article written by Dr. Art Markman in Psychology Today raises an interesting question.
How do you envision your future?
This question was explored in a paper in the August 2011 issue of Memory and Cognition by Kathleen Arnold, Kathleen McDermott, and Karl Szpunar. The research points out that your ability to envision the future is strongly influenced by your memory for the past. That is, you tend to use memories of past experiences to predict what your life will be like in the near and far future.
It was concluded that it is easier to use your memories when the future you are predicting is close in time, raising the question, do memories from the far past govern your actions without your knowledge.
We are creatures of habit. Therefore, you have already experienced many specific locations and events that are the ones you will encounter again next week. If you are working you will rise in the morning, get dressed and find your way to your workplace. This is experience is such a habit you will hardly remember getting there. As a result, you can do a good job of imagining through simulation what your life will look like next week.
According to the research cited above, it is harder to guess the effect past memories will have for understanding your life in the distant future. Elapsed time makes it more difficult to make specific future predictions.
Consequently, as an adult, if you have suppressed bad memories of an abusive relationship it is more difficult to predict how you will react to a similar relationship now.
There is an important reason to remember and deal with your past before it controls your future. The philosopher George Santayana wisely pointed out that if we don’t take time to reflect on our past behavior, we may unwittingly repeat it in the future. This is not only true for our behavior but true for other people’s actions toward us.
Forgive and forget may not be the best advice. Forgive and remember, so the transgression does not happen again may be a better choice for a healthy future.
Forewarned by memories is forearmed for the future.
Life is a series of lessons. If we do not think about how badly we were treated, come to terms with it, and use that knowledge to make choices about what to do to protect ourselves in the near future, we’re less vulnerable to being treated that way again.
Stumbling beneath the weight of her horrific past, Prudence has taken the first big step toward correcting her course for the future by remembering and healing her past with the help of therapy.
InDreams cover 3 our darkest hours, we often pray for help and guidance but forget, or don’t know how to watch for the answers in our waking world. According to the New York Times, at least 10 studies on the effects of prayers and healing have been carried out in the last 6 years, and this question continues among researchers.
What if… the life-saving answers come to us in dreams, as studies by Duke University Radiologist Dr. Larry Burk have shown? What if… we are guided to seek help in the form of therapy with a therapist chosen by God? What if… you are the answer to that therapist’s dreams which were also heard by the Lord?
The Lord works in mysterious ways.
A producer met Jennifer Irwin in LA. After reading the manuscript, the producer purchased the film rights. Production of the film A Dress, the Color of Sky, is scheduled to begin in early 2018 with some well-known names attached.
Watch as Jennifer introduces you to Prudence who is struggling to emerge from the dark places of her past and step into the light of a new day.
Prudence’s struggle is one many of us live with, and often die from if left unchecked.
Your View Of The Future Is Shaped By The Past | Psychology … (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/ulterior-motives/201108/your-view-the-futur https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/ulterior-motives/201108/your-view-the-future-is-shaped-the-past
The Link Between Emotions And Health | Psychologies, https://www.psychologies.co.uk/self/the-link-between-emotions-and-health.html (accessed January 13, 2018).
A-Dress-the-Color-of-Sky.jpg January 13, 2018 used with author’s permission.
Dreams That Can Save Your Life used with author Kathleen O’Keefe-Kanavos permission
About the Author: Kathleen (Kat) O’Keefe-Kanavos is a TV Producer/Host and Author/Lecturer of Dreams That Can Save Your Life which promotes patient advocacy and connecting with Dreams for success in health, wealth, and relationships. Contact –Kathleen O’Keefe-Kanavos Website – Inner Guide Facebook – Personal Facebook – Surviving Cancerland Facebook – Wicked Housewives TV Facebook – Wicked Housewives Radio Facebook –Dreams That Can Save Your Life Facebook- Google+ – LinkedIn – Pinterest – Twitter – Youtube- Book
Quote: “Old habits are hard to break. It’s like toilet training your inner-child. Don’t give up on them.” ~Kathleen O’Keefe-Kanavos
What are the warning signs and symptoms that your anxiety is progressing to overwhelming stress that may become depression? And, what can you do to prevent it? Part three of this three-part series on post-holiday depression focuses on holistic cures, solutions, and preventions to the after-party-blues.
Some of us are natural care givers by nature. We live to help. We love to give. Our nurturing mother-within thinks carrying other people’s troubles for them it will lighten their load. It doesn’t. It just makes your life heavier. And that is depressing.
Understanding and embracing this rule-of-life teaches us an important lesson—We cannot carry other people’s “stuff”, talk their talk for them or walk their path for them. We can respect their life-lessons to be learned by them. And, perhaps our lesson may be to respect and love them enough to let them make mistakes and learn from those lessons.
Temporarily offer your shoulder but not your back. Let me explain.
There is a big difference between being spiritually supportive and being an emotional mule. A supportive person lends a helping hand or a shoulder to cry on. A mule carries the weight of the world on their back while refusing to focus on their own life and issues—this is avoidance. It only takes another challenge to be the straw that breaks the mule’s back and sends them spiraling into depression.
Be the shoulder to cry on with a non-negotiable time limitation.
According to the Journal of Clinical Psychology, as little as a thirty-minute cardiovascular routine can provide an immediate natural mood boost similar to the effects felt after taking an antidepressant medication. This healthy holistic response can be due to endorphins released by the body during exercise. The same effect can be accomplished by a daily routine involving a brisk walk.
The Mayo Clinic advocates acknowledgment of stress and talking about and speaking with professionals about depression as a big step in working through it.
Here are additional ways to combat post-holiday depression:
Return to or begin eating a healthy diet.
Re-establish and maintain a regular sleep pattern
Do something once a day that brings you joy
Our mind is a beautiful thing. Experience can teach us that we manifest not only what we want in life but also what we need. Sometimes that need is to slow down, reassess our lives and reconnect to inner guidance through dreams, prayers, and meditation. Depression can serve us in this capacity. It is not an enjoyable experience and few of us would choose to go through it again. However, it can be a sign from inner-guidance that it is time to reassess our lives. By facing our depression rather than suppressing it, we can learn from it, use it to change our life, and ultimately respect it to survive adversity and illness.
Don’t let your post-holidays become something you dread. Instead, take steps to prevent the stress that can lead to depression during and after the parties have ended. Learn to recognize your post-holiday depression triggers. These may include financial pressures and personal demands. Focusing on solutions that work for you can help disconnect those emotional buttons that trigger depression. Combat triggers with awareness before they lead to a meltdown. With a little planning, awareness, and positive thinking, you can find peace and joy during and after the holidays.
ABOUT THE HOST/AUTHOR: Kathleen (Kat) O’Keefe-Kanavos TV/Radio Host/Producer of Wicked Housewives On Cape Cod ™ believes your DREAMS can diagnose your life. She’s Host of the Kat Kanavos Show on New Earth International, Patheos blogger, Author/Lecturer of Award winning, International bestseller, Surviving Cancerland: Intuitive Aspects of Healing: which promotes patient advocacy & connecting with Inner-guidance through Dreams, Prayers & Meditations. Learn more @ www.AccessYourInnerGuide.com
(All pictures and quotes were used with permission from the guest or are owned by the author.)
Instead, take steps to prevent the stress that can lead to depression during and after the parties have ended. Learn to recognize your post-holiday depression triggers. These may include financial pressures and personal demands. 
ABOUT THE HOST/AUTHOR: Kathleen (Kat) O’Keefe-Kanavos TV/Radio Host/Producer of Wicked Housewives On Cape Cod 